Attention dear followers

I have spend a long time without posting anything and that has a reason. 

I felt like the last few of my pieces that I uploaded where coming more from a the notion that I have to upload writings not because I feltthe genuine impulse to share them. 

I want to start a new with a new blog and use that one to truly share what I feel I want to put out there. 

It will take a couple of days to get it up and running and I will post the link to my new blog here. 

Thank you.

What is the most beautiful thing on earth ?

If someone would ask me that question, I would answer:

There are many things in this world, this universe, that are full of beauty. The stars as they light up the sky, like small openings of heaven, they spread their light to bring balance into this seemingly ever-expanding darkness of space. That is beauty.

Nature in herself is an explosion of beauty. She is a treasure chest that we barely opened yet. Her forests, rivers, mountains, her fertile soil, her crystal clear oceans – they are all equal sources of abundance and a display of her artistic capabilities, as nature is the greatest artist of all. And when I ponder about this beauty surrounding us, it takes away my breath every time and brings to life such a deep sense of appreciation and humbleness towards this incredible mystery that lies at the heart of nature. That is beauty.

All of these things are sources of beauty, but there is something that is even more beautiful than these things. What that may be, one might ask.

Let me tell what in my opinion is the most beautiful thing on earth:

A human being, a human being coming alive, coming to appreciate the miracle of life as it unfolds within them and the world that surrounds them.

Looking into a pair of eyes overflowing with radiant life, giving you a taste of that fire burning in that person’s soul, truly no greater beauty can be found.

It is so captivating to witness when a human being moves beyond his or her fears when one’s conditioning is losing its grip, when one’s human expression in all its uniqueness begins flowing freely, truly, there is nothing as beautiful as that.

When all the gifts and talents that one has been given come to the surface and a human being is flowing over with creativity, with enthusiasm, with joy and then becomes a portal through which Spirit can flow freely into the world to create captivating art, stunning music and moving poetry, that carries within itself a beauty that I fail to be able to compare to anything else.

Words, words, so many words..

Words, words, so many words..

Words are dead and yet they carry life within them, like pills that encapsulate the life-saving substance in their cold dead plastic skin. Words, language… in my opinion one of the most impressive inventions of humankind, the one that fascinates me tremendously.

Words are in themselves only meaningful in the context of meaning we ascribe to them, otherwise, they are empty and meaningless and yet, they are maybe the most helpful thing we as a species have ever brought forth.

Without them, Lovers couldn’t surrender themselves to each other, they couldn’t pour their hearts into letters that transcend the limitations of distance.

Without them, there would be no jokes being told around the table and the joy and laughter that would echo through the room would go unheard and unfelt, what a loss that would be.

Without them, we couldn’t enjoy the dance of the poet’s pen on paper, onto which he poured his very soul during a dark night when Spirit breathed inspiration into his tired body.

Without them, a silent prayer of gratitude whispered into the night’s sky being carried by the winds could not reach its destination in the ethereal regions.

We talk so much, so so much, every single day, so much that we have forgotten the sweet taste of silence, we have forgotten, that silence has a language of its own and it sounds beautiful if we would be able to hear again.

But nevertheless, I love it, that meaningless blabbering coming out of our mouths.

We belong here

I know it is hard to believe nowadays, but we belong here. You, I, everyone belongs here. We made our planetary home our enemy because we made ourselves into an enemy, but we human beings belong here.

We belong here, like the bird’s wings cutting through the sky,
We belong here, like the fish piercing through the ocean’s skin,
We belong here, like the seed in the soil awaiting its own blossoming,
Let us not believe otherwise, we belong here.

Don’t make yourself believe otherwise.. you too belong here.

Cup of Truth

A poem inspired by an experience I had a while ago, that had a life-changing impact on me.

I drank,

Unknowingly leaving behind myself,
Laying open before me the mess of what I was, that I am.
A journey into an ocean of unknowing,
Leaving behind the burden of knowledge,
Witnessing the birth of wonder within.

Facing the demons that lurked in me,
No help, no guidance, just facing the mess of myself in silence,
Facing Truth, cutting through the layers of my lies,
She threw me into the dirt of my own selfishness,
Offering her loving hand to help me stand up,
Before me, a vision of what can be.

Washing off the dirt with tears of Love and Grace,
She held me high, in the immensity of her loving forgiveness,
Me, holding the knowing of what I may become,
Awakening of potential within, I stood firm on the ashes of what is left behind,
I see the world anew, beauty all around, I see, with eyes washed clean,
Your manifestation, nothing but Love overflowing.

I stumbled across the floor,
Trying to reach the warming fire to warm the cold I touched within me,
Sitting in the darkness of the night, there was light glowing within,
Sitting next to each other, more has been said with silence, than words are able to,
Immersed in Life’s song I let myself fall into the moment, letting go,
Time stood still as I witnessed the mystery around.

Exhaustion and nausea led me to my place to rest,
Her whisper following my every step,
Closing my eyes, She paints pictures in my mind’s eye,
Colors and sounds of immense beauty where my lullaby,
Reflecting on what I just experienced, I laughed with tears,
Life is much more beautiful than it appears.



What does it mean, to be human?

What does it mean, to be human?

I think, that this is a question we all asked ourselves. I mean here we are, humans, this species walking on two feet on a floating island called earth, what a mysterious and rather odd situation when we think about it – like holy shit, you are alive! Just take one little moment and acknowledge this. You are alive and in front of you is nothing else than the possibility, to embrace what is right in front of your face, there is no guidebook, no manual for how to be alive. We are born into a mystery and the only sane thing to do is to embrace it for what it is.

So what does it mean to be human, to be alive? Is this life not more than mindless consumption and neurotic gratification through all kinds of things we distract ourselves with? To fill this horrible emptiness that is lurking within us, if we don’t do anything at all? If we allow ourselves to just be, we all feel it to some extent, a feeling of isolation, of meaninglessness, of not being good enough, a subtle sense of fear – it is the background noise of our lives, it is the underlying sense of knowing that there is something wrong, it is the human condition today.

Being human means more than consuming and buying one goodie after another while carrying the illusion, that this will make you happy or whole. Our lives have grown shallow and loose their substance. People are frustrated, full of anger and fear, the light in their eyes has vanished.  It is almost like they need sticks to hold their eyes open because they are so tired.( Just like in the picture above 😉 )We are in desperate need to be woken up to the miracle that is in a continuing process of unfolding around us. We have, to a large extent, grown cold and insensitive to ourselves and the world. Looking around I ask myself – and that is what it means to experience human life? This has to be a joke that I fail to find funny in any way. WAKE UP!

This feeling tries to tell us something, if we are courageous enough, to listen, it will tell us that we have to stop. We have to stop wasting our time, we have to stop forcing us to be anything else than what we are right now, we have to stop letting fear make our decisions for us, we have to stop worrying about what other people think, we have to stop trying to fulfill their expectations, we have to see that life is so much more than what we have been told. This is so amazing, it is so precious, so fragile, life is a gift and you are a gift to life.

Being human means, to be full of mistakes and to be vulnerable. There is no strength in keeping up your shield, there is tremendous strength in dropping it and to be open. Nothing is more strong and courageous than to reveal yourself to this world as you are. No filter, no makeup, no bullshit, just the beauty of raw humanness. To be human means, to create, not just to consume. To be human means to help your fellow men, to live life to the fullest because there is nothing left to do other than that. You are not the character this world wants you to be – not these limiting beliefs, these doubts, this fear that has been injected into you since you were born. Shake it off. You are brilliance itself, you hold more potential than you were told. We must do life the favor, to be fully alive, to create, to add to its majesty. A life will have gone to waste if it didn’t bring more beauty to the world.

To be human means, to explore your inner world, to face the darkness that lives there, to move beyond it, to make as many mistakes as possible, fall on your knees as often as possible and stand up again. Life here is challenging, it will always be and it’s good that way because that’s the only thing that makes us grow as human beings. Now go and stand on your own two feet, because no one will do it for you. You stand alone, there are friends, family, and relationships, but you have to stand alone, they can’t be there forever and they won’t, but to be able to stand alone without someone else as a crutch to help you do that is something incredibly important, it will remove neediness and the feeling of being dependent on others out of your life experience and only then true human relation is possible, then they are rooted in freedom, in acceptance and maturity.

This is it. This is life, your life – live it your way, not someone else’s way. You have nothing to lose. You can do anything you want, everything is just open for you to explore. Just have trust and there will be doors opened for you, that otherwise would have stayed shut.

Life, our universe, our planet and our place in all of this – the miracle of existence

Life is a wonderful thing, it is really a great and sacred miracle, that we experience in every second of our lives, but when do we actually take the time, to drop our worries, doubts, fears and plans – even just for a minute – to just recognize that? Just take a deep breath and take in with all your senses what is around you. Let that sink in: You are alive, a human being, part of the human family, unique in your expression you share an immense sameness with everyone around you. Life is so amazing.

Now when we look around, we often see the symptoms of a disease, that has befallen so many of us, all around the world. The symptoms of this disease are environmental pollution, wars, poverty, racism, sexism – any form of suffering inflicted on human beings or nature. I asked myself quite a while, what the root cause of those symptoms might be and I could only find an answer by looking at myself and what I found as the root of all those problems we face and what I found is the overall sense of separation from ourselves, each other and our surrounding world. This hallucination of separation that has been culturally conditioned in front of our perception and our experience of reality is one of the main causes of all the problems we have in our world.

Look around you. The trees you see, they are your lungs, because they clean the very air you breathe.

The seas, lakes, and rivers around you, they are your veins, , the water they give nourishes you, just like the blood in your veins is keeping your body alive.

The acres, the soil, the earth that you walk upon, they are your support to let you stand strong and they are the ground in which your food grows.

What happens when those lungs are destroyed, those rivers and seas are being poisoned and the earth you put your feet on will be so infused with chemicals and pesticides, that the earth that once helped you to stand on your own, will cauterize your very feet?

We will fall and this is what we see happening today and if we want to put an end to the destruction of our very Source, that nourishes us and makes it possible for us to live, we have to remember our deep connection with our earth and with each other. How could we be able to kill our very Source that enables us to live, if deep in our hearts we could feel her being alive herself? Could we kill the mother that gave birth to us? No. Why then do we do it to the mother of all of us? Because we lost touch with her on a much deeper level than physical reality. This will sound too much for some people, especially people that look for all the answers in science, but I say it as I feel it to be true and as I experience it, when I spend time in nature:

Earth is alive, she is an intelligent Being in herself.

This is what we have to recognize, if we want to survive as a race, as one human family. So no, you are not a meaningless fragment in an alienating world. The earth that now helps you to stand and support you, one day will be the bed where you will fall into your final sleep. It all came from the earth and returns to it. Treat it with respect. So whatever keeps you in feeling isolated, in the feeling of being unimportant, put it aside.

Drop those beliefs, drop those limitations that have been put on the brilliance and potential that you really are, no matter how hard that may because let’s just be honest for a minute here. We have become addicted, addicted to the feeling of powerlessness that has been infused into us, to those so-called limitations that we were told to believe in, of not being part of something much greater than we could ever imagine. You are strong and there is something within you, that no one told you exist, a treasure of greater worth than anything the world has to offer. Be courageous, be brave, be true and be you, give yourself the permission, to let your brilliance be expressed in some way and never let anyone take away your power, stand tall on your own two feet and walk with integrity and righteousness.

The times that we are living in are confusing, exhausting and troubling and bring a lot of challenges with them and there is no mistake to be made about it, we are indeed facing global crisis, but crisis gives birth to opportunity, opportunity for new ideas to be heard, opportunity for new ways of thinking to arise and with those things something new can see the light of the world. If we now take into consideration all that is happening in the world, it needs no saving, it needs no one to look after, once we rediscover this deep connection we have, but this fact is not an excuse not to care for the home we have, but to keep it in a bigger perspective. You are not here to save the earth, you are here to get to know who you really are, so don’t get too entangled in the world and neither renounce it.

You go and take responsibility for how you interact with other people, how you treat the earth and what kind of energy you radiate into the world, get into alignment with your Being and trust it, never ever will it lead you astray. We have to move away from fear more and more, because fear keeps us from realizing how powerful we are, because you are far more powerful than you were told and grew up to believe.

Revolutionary heart

It beats so strong, oh so strong,
Oh dear soul, you must listen to its song,
Have no fear for it is your guide,
There is no more time for concern, it is time to unite.

It has been there your whole life through,
But it spoke in silence,
Many chances to listen, you dismissed them though,
Because it spoke in silence, a place you never wanted to go to.

So now, amidst this noisy world, retreat into silence,
It will be loud at first, but soon you will hear,
That underneath your confusion everything is so very clear.
That whatever you must endure, it is worth it, be sure.

It beats so strong, oh so strong,
Oh, dear soul, you must listen to its song,
Have no fear it is your guide,
There is no more time for concern, it is time to unite.

Our world is in danger and this is what you can do about it.

Humanity is facing crisis, there is a battle being fought on the surface of our planet, a battle for our future and for all generations that will come through us and who will continue the legacy of the human race.

Every aspect of our lives is highly dysfunctional – education, finance, politics, economy, medicine, relationships…We are so misaligned that we have created a very unhappy and neurotic civilization which is the symptom of too much mind and not enough heart! Yes the surface of things is looking rather unpromising, but I say do not despair and have no fear, keep strong, within and for the world out there.

I see many people who are very engaged in trying to stop climate change, or trying to save the planet… but they miss the point completely, even though their intentions are good and there is a place for cleaning up the mess we have made of this magnificent beauty and gift that we call earth, but we seem to forget that mother earth needs no one to save her, the power she has transcends the limits of our human understanding. Your job is the not to save the earth, that’s not what you’re here for. How should we humans be able the to save earth if we aren’t even able to live in peace with our neighbor if we aren’t able to enjoy our own company?

Don’t waste your time trying to save the planet, or to fight climate change and what not… that’s not your job. If the earth feels in any way threatened by humans, she will get rid of us, it’s that easy. She can shake us off like a bad case of fleas if she feels the need to. She gives life and she takes life. Your job is to be aligned with her ways and to live in harmony with her, with others, with yourself and to follow your intuition, because if we’re running around like maniacs trying to save this and that, we cause more destruction than we think, like the old saying says:”The path to hell is paved with good intentions.”

Your one and only job is to become sensitive enough to feel what your intuition is guiding you to do and to let it be the guiding force of your life. Through doing this, you do the planet the greatest favor, you will work in the world with wisdom and your actions will truly bear good fruit that serves others, make your life a piece of art, I mean.. could you imagine this world when everyone would live more from the heart? This planet would be a work of art the gods couldn’t take their eyes off.

It is something I realized after having spent a lot of time trying to figure out what I should do and the more problems I became aware of, the more overwhelmed I became by the mess we call western civilization and its effects on earth. There is too much to be done as to put all of it on your shoulders, so all I can suggest is, have a vision for your life, be strong and brave, don’t give in to fear and be receptive to your inner being, it will never ever lead you astray – the survival of humanity is dependent on the transformation of the individual.

Come on people, we can do this, time to shake off doubts and fears. Remember the strength that lives within and together we can take responsibility for the world we will create. Everything is possible for us, limitations only exist when we believe in them.



Months spend in solitude and times of reflection, sharing my experience

This will be a very long piece of writing and I thank everyone in advance who will take the time to read what I’ll share with the world, it is deeply appreciated.

I left home after I finished school, leaving behind everything I’ve ever known, I threw myself into the unknown, not really knowing why I did that, partly because university or another form of formal education just didn’t felt right at that time and I trusted this feeling, thank goodness I did, as the following 16 months of travelling on the other side of the world teached me more than I could have ever imagined and by all means there have been terribly tough times, where I feared for my sanity and maybe I lost a bit of that as well, feels like it at least.

I have been back home since last year of July and strangely it doesn’t felt too much like home in the essential sense of the word anymore.. probably because the meaning of the word expanded to the whole world. The whole time being back in the city I spend 20 years of my life was rather strange. Nothing here really changed, but it felt different, alienating in a way because my inner reality didn’t correspond with my outer reality anymore. I feel like a stranger where I should’ve felt at home, but this is what 16 months of living differently can do to you.

I was overwhelmed by everything going on in my life, I had a lot to integrate and life constantly threw challenges and situations at me that forced me to move ahead even though I felt anything else but ready, but that’s how we grow, I guess. Growth happens when we face resistance, that builds character. This whole time has killed a lot of assumptions and illusions that I carried within me, about the world, myself and what I thought I knew. Being by yourself in silence without a distraction is not easy because you can’t put a filter over meeting yourself in an honest way and what we get to see is not always nice, sometimes its scary, because as we dig deeper into our own psyche and being, we discover beauty as well as hard facts about ourselves. This is real life, not Instagram.

I don’t know if what I’ll write might hurt someone, upset someone, inspires someone, but I need to write it, for my own sake, to summarize everything that I realized and all the harsh facts I had to accept, to make a somehow clear cut and ground to move on and maybe this will help someone.

For the most time when I was alone, I thought a lot about death, God, the meaning and purpose of life and a lot of other things. For the most part, it felt like examining and questioning everything I’ve ever hold true or believed in, it was refreshing, depressing, uplifting and terrifying to do so, but certain experiences in my life left me with no other choice.

So let’s start with one thing so many are so terribly afraid of, death. This five letter word that makes people nervous and tense, yes death is real, we are all going to die sooner or later and we don’t know when this will happen, it is unknown. I’m not necessarily afraid of death, I am more afraid of giving life not the honoring it deserves by living it fully. Let’s face it, we don’t know what will happen afterward, if anything happens at all..which I am pretty sure of. There is more to man than his wandering amidst the phenomenal world from his crib to his deathbed. So, on one hand, I somehow think there will be something after death, but what this something will be? No one knows, nobody died fully, spent a bit of time in the afterlife and came back to tell us, unfortunately – I would love to know more about what happens on the other side.

I’ve red about how happy and peaceful people died, how fulfilling death can be and so I am more afraid of not giving life my full attention, my full appreciation, my full gratitude, because my goodness look at the world ( it is a crazy place, yeah, but there is beauty in it ), look up to the stars, isn’t it amazing ? It’s such a miraculous existence that we find ourselves in, sadly we don’t recognize it that much anymore. All I can say is:”Go, go and live and don’t be afraid. Trust yourself and be kind on the way, what comes after this is unknown only this life is sure, see it as an opportunity to make the world more beautiful, bring more joy into people’s lives, do something that adds to the celebration of life, because it’s  a celebration, not the drudgery that most people experience day in, day out.”

Okay, so what about God ?Does he exist or doesn’t he? No he doesn’t,for those who don’t believe in him and on the other hand he does for those who believe in him. Everybody can choose what to believe in, but belief is not very substantial, belief in God is rational, knowing God is existential and I don’t claim to know him, I’m just human being trying to make up answers to the mystery of our wonderful universe. Whether God exist the way we think he does, or if he doesn’t is not of importance, as life exist equally for everyone, whether they believe or don’t and I can’t understand people that feel it to be righteous to make others submit to their version of God or else they will face eternal condemnation in hell.

So I come to my own conclusion, that nobody understands what God is, no one really does.. the picture of an old man with a long white beard? This father figure of authority is an imagination of the human mind, it’s a lie religion sold to people to make them easier to control, as nothing manipulates our emotions and thoughts more than pictures planted in our minds. I don’t know what God is, but if I would have to give a personal definition of what my understanding of God would be, if the human language could point towards the metaphysical infinity it intends to describe, it would be the all permating designing intelligence that underlies the world, the universe, everything. But in the end… what do I know, I’m really just trying to make sense of life myself.

Another thing I asked myself a lot is, if there is a purpose or meaning to life, to life in general, to our personal lives and so on.. Everyone wants to feel valued and appreciated for the things they can offer to the world, everyone wants to feel like their existence contributes to the world, but does that necessarily is the meaning or purpose for a human being to exist ? No, I don’t think so.. as if the value of a human life can be reduced to what he or she contributes, the purpose of a human life is fulfilled by the simple fact that one exist, not that one exists for doing this or that. Things, objects exist for a specific purpose,  but the brilliance of a human being can’t be reduced to that. The purpose of our lives changes when we change, the more we grow, the more our purpose grows, it’s a process.

This is our freedom, this is our dignity as living beings. You are alive, you have a beating heart in your chest that pumps blood through your veins, you have lungs to breath and you don’t have to justify being alive by doing anything or nervously looking for your purpose. Relax. It’s fine, not to know what to do with your life, but don’t let that turn into an excuse to be lazy. Life is pretty amazing, with or without purpose, but give yourself a break once in a while, you’re a human being, not a human doing. So in the end I think there is a bigger picture to everything, a purpose to existence , but if we are able to put that into words is pretty unrealistic.

How may I continue.. the world, this planet we call earth.. it holds so much beauty, but so much ugliness as well.. we tend to just see the good and turn a blind eye to the horror of the world, out of ignorance, or not being able to stand the pain,but whatever reason one holds to look away, it is not the right way to deal with things. We must acknowledge that living here contains suffering for everyone.Everybody experiences suffering in their lives and we probabaly would have less of it if we would embrace it for what it is, rather than trying to run away, hide from it or suppress it. There will always be suffering but we don’t have to suffer over that fact, but to simply acknowledge the reality of it. This sounds depressing in a way, but when do we take time to acknowledge that ? Life is not just pleasure.. suffering makes you real, nothing in life has ever teached me more humility and humbleness.

But as much suffering there is, there is an equal amount of joy and love in the world, but news and media always portray a picture of the world, that it’s a place you shouldn’t trust, to be suspicious, cautious, full of fear. I tell you, go and do trust it, have no fear ( or at least don’t give in to your fear ), give it a chance to show you it’s beauty, give it a chance to show you that people have good hearts. The ugliness of the world, the chaos should motivate us to make our lives a statement of  peace, and an act of adding beauty to the world in whatever form. Life is a celebration, not a struggle, all we need to do is to relax into it and see where it takes us. The way we have been brought up to live in the world is a lie. Go to school, work, pay bills and die. There is more to life and the world than this mundane way of living we were brought up to believe in. All I can say is, think for yourself, don’t believe everything you read and see and trust yourself and your own journey and give the world a chance and yourself as well, life can be so amazing if we can get out of our minds and live from the heart.

I don’t know, this was a rant of some sort, a summary of many things I thought about and which I experienced since being back in this town that I grew up in and all that I somehow want to get across to you is a different perspective on things. After spending 16 months in a completely different way of life, many things I once held true turned out to be lies and maybe this will help you, to start questioning as well, the world and the reality we experience and yourself as well, it might be a catalyst of growth.

Thank you for reading these words.